My Favourite Superhero Movie

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I think about movies A LOT my day usually goes a little like this:

I wake up thinking about movies. I go to work thinking about movies. At work I’m thinking about movies and sometimes watching movies. On my way home from work I’m thinking about movies. At home I’m watching movies and thinking about other movies.

Today during the viewing of Royal Warriors, starring Michelle Khan (Yeoh), I was thinking a lot about Eighties movies how Spielberg made his best movies during the 1980’s, except for Jaws which is the best movie ever made, in my opinion at least. John Carpenter made his best movies in the Eighties Assault on Precinct 13, Escape From New York, Big Trouble In Little China and of course the second best movie ever made The Thing. Due to my viewing of an Eighties kung-fu action movie I was also thinking about Jackie Chan movies and how all his starring role movies of the Eighties were amazingly awesome Police Story, Police Story 2, Police Story 3, Project A, Wheels On Meals, Armour of God, Dragons Forever, it made me wish the United Kingdom would exchange with China England for Hong Kong, because since Hong Kong became part of China movies from that area of the world have been poor indeed compared to Hong Kong movies pre-China re-integration, I figure the Chinese government puts pressure on the movie industry to make movies that are less entertaining but culturally and historically important to the Chinese government. Well you know what China fuck your promoting of China via the movie industry give the movies back to the creators and let’s have something as barmy as God of Gamblers once again. Please.

Thoughts of a movie nature eventually centred on the fact, as far as I’m concerned, that modern movies suck, especially in comparison to Eighties flicks, modern movies seem stuck in a rut, they’re so fucking bland paying for a cinema ticket seems an insult cinema visits should be free. In addition, and again in my opinion, movies these days are so poorly written I figure a little kid wrote the scripts using a big fat wax crayon. That was melting all over the kids chubby little fingers. Which sounds dirtier than I intended.

Big budget blockbusters tend to be remakes, reboots, re-imaginings or influenced heavily by comic books, now I’m a self confessed comic book geek, I always have been I always will be as long as there’s a comic book industry, however I care not at all for comic book movies, other than Superman I and II, Spider-Man 1 and 2 and Scott Pilgrim versus The World, I’m of the opinion that the Wachowski brothers made the best superhero movie, The Matrix, and so far no one’s come close to making a better superhero flick.

Neo’s superhero origin is better than all the comic book heroes origins except for Superman’s, nothing beats Superman’s origin story.

Doomed planet.

Desperate scientists.

Last hope.

Kindly couple.

Grant Morrison and Frank Quitely managed Superman’s origin with just four panels on one page, a movie these days wastes its entire time on a superheroes origin, a new Spider-Man movie means a new version of the characters origin. Why?

The Matrix is not only the best superhero movie it’s the coolest superhero story, it steals from some stuff I love Grant Morrison’s The Invisibles, Ghost in the Shell, kung-fu movies and it mixes it all together perfectly. I love The Matrix, it’s hard for me to understand how any geek kinda doesn’t, you know the type, ‘oh it’s alright’, fuck off it’s a geeky wet dream right there on the screen, cinema or more likely these days TV.

Obviously not relying on comic book source material helps The Matrix be, hands down, the best superhero movie the look of the film is more stylish and unique than any superhero movie I’ve ever seen, add the fashion and ‘I know kung-fu’ and Marvel Studios just cannot compete.

EVER!

What I don’t understand is why there’s not more related material in existence, where are all the cool comic books set in The Matrix? Where are the video games? The animated series? The live action TV series? Additional movies?

The Matrix is THE franchise ripe for exploration, anything can happen, comedy, horror, thriller, action movie, kung-fu movie, buddy cop, serious drama, kitchen sink misery.

If I was a filmmaker (and it’s a good job I’m not because all my ideas sound ace, to me, but are actually probably wank, Flash Gordon versus Star Trek; Star Wars versus Cthulhu; Battlestar Galactica versus Aliens; Superheroes versus Alien Invasion versus Zombie Apocalypse) I’d be insisting that the world needs a new movie set in The Matrix, perhaps a small comedy movie to begin with think Office Space, Neo as Thomas Anderson worked in an office he had terrible timekeeping was regularly reprimanded there’s a dry black comedy right there, and then there’s the horror it was established in the sequels to The Matrix that vampires and ghosts exist run with that, some crazy horny teens drinking and fucking doing drugs ascend to a level of consciousness that allows them to realise they’re inside a computer program, cue the arrival of a deletion program in the form of a nasty vampire, extreme blood and gore follow with some physics bending action as the teens figure if the world they exist within isn’t real then they can run up walls and leap tall buildings in a single bound.

I don’t get how The Matrix wasn’t bigger, in other mediums, than it turned out, I can remember back in the day hoping for some really interesting, brilliantly written comic books featuring amazing artwork that expanded upon all the ideas the Wachowski’s threw onto a cinema screen, there could have been a series of outrageously awesome comic books that explored philosophical ideas and the nature of reality as we perceive and experience it and I kinda feel robbed, cheated if you like, that such material never materialised.

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