Preacher Two Point Seven

This episode starts in Vietnam with a magic pig and Herr Starr.

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Other than float like a butterfly the pig doesn’t seem capable of anything else magical.

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Herr Starr however manages to wander the world, including muddy Third World villages and keep his white suit immaculate, maybe he’s wearing a similar suit to the Alec Guinness character from the British movie The Man In The White Suit, I don’t know for sure but it seems that way.

This episode then progresses to lovely New Orleans, featuring local government employees travelling the city in cart like vehicles picking up people who have passed out in the street from consuming too much alcohol, kinda like here in the U.K. on a Saturday/Sunday morning.

Every weekend here in Britain a large population of Brits drunk so much alcohol they pass out in the street, on one memorable occasion I was making my way home in the early hours of a Saturday morning and three separate young women where passed out in the street of my local town, I daren’t stop to help them in case they woke and screamed rape I just kept on walking, stepping over one young woman who was face down on the ground blocking my path.

It was quite an unpleasant experience and not one I’m hoping to repeat.

Jesse Custer is still having no luck tracking God so listening to Cassidy, never a good idea, the trio of misfits end up at a place where a person can pay to shoot another person, wearing a bulletproof vest, or be the person being shot, wearing a bulletproof vest.

I wonder if New Orleans really does feature little carts that pick up passed out drunkards, or dead people, and bars where you can shoot people or be shot it doesn’t seem real, it seems like make believe but because it’s America I can believe it to be real. No matter how crazy a story might sound if a person sets the story in the United States I’m happy to believe any outrageous story is in fact true.

Once again it’s Tulip that drives the story forward, she’s the character that is the most human and the most aware of the situations this trio of misfits find themselves in. Cassidy is of course evil, he is after all a vampire, an undead thing, Jesse Custer isn’t all there, not stupid or insane, just not present in the moment, lots of people are like that, I am, people often comment that I don’t pay attention and it’s true I don’t some days I don’t even know what the day is. That’s no lie, I can assume a Monday is actually a Friday and vice versa and Jesse Custer strikes me as a similar sort no matter what’s going on around him he’s not completely present incapable of paying attention.

As a person who likes, nay LOVES, random acts of violence, in fiction but not the real world, I enjoyed Herr Starr’s origin story.

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One of the reasons I enjoy Preacher is because of the random acts of violence another reason is because of the fact dialogue includes swearing.

I fucking love swearing, I’m forty five years old I hate entertainment that panders to kids and much prefer entertainment with a shit ton of swearing. Not that swearing is always appropriate in real life, I don’t swear in front of my mother, old people and young children, but if I’m amongst people aged 18 to 60 I’ll swear like a Goddamn motherfucker. Or father if you’re that way inclined.

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Preacher Two Point Six

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What a fucking episode. Now this is good TV, forget your Walking Dead’s, and spin-offs, and your Game of Thrones, and eventual spin-offs, they’re shit but this, Preacher, this is what good looks like.

In my opinion, unpopular obviously, this TV show, Preacher, is much, much better than The Walking Dead and Game of Thrones but there doesn’t seem to be any buzz about Preacher. No one seems that arsed about it, no one seems to be pissed off with it and I like that. Most, if not all, of the TV shows I enjoy prove unpopular and as a person who is disinclined to popularity it’s nice that, in America at least, unpopular shows that I can enjoy still keep on kicking.

This episode begins with desperate people prepared to sell anything they can to survive one more day in paradise. Naturally paradise, or Earth, ain’t much of a paradise crapsack world is a more accurate description.

A strange company, Japanese it seems, buys a commodity from poor desperate people and pays what appears to be a decent price, hundreds of thousands of dollars, but the commodity they buy they sell to wealthy people for millions robbing the rich to pay the poor but keeping most of the wealth for themselves. A good business strategy, obviously in our real crapsack world the reverse is true robbing the poor to benefit the wealthy.

As a fan of the Preacher comic book and of Steve Dillon’s artistry for as long as I can remember I like that he’s still given credit as an executive producer I know we’re never going to see new artwork from one of my favourite artists ever again but it’s nice to be reminded he was once here.

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The Saint of Killers kills his way closer and closer to our heroes, although I’m not sure if the main characters can actually be considered heroic sure they’re the main characters of the show but that doesn’t mean they’re heroes if it was possible to meet folk just like them we’d probably think of them as villains.

As comic book geek I was filled with joy when a comic page appeared on screen a page from the Saint of Killers mini-series that featured his origin story first published way back in the mid-Nineties.

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Jesse Custer meets the Saint of Killers.

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So does Tulip.

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Custer claims he can get something the Saint of Killers wants but he needs the Japanese to help him.

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And the episode ends with victory of a sort.

Preacher Two Point Five

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I like Preacher the TV series because like the comic books it’s not politically correct, I get the entire PC thing we can’t go having minorities, and women, abused physically, mentally and verbally it’s just not nice but at the same time as a white heterosexual male I’m opposed to all this horseshit that makes claim that I as a white heterosexual male should feel ashamed or some kind of guilt.

Fuck that I’m happy to be white heterosexual and male and it sure beats all the fucking alternatives, I don’t know if you’ve also noticed but, and this seems like a fact, in predominantly white society everyone who isn’t white heterosexual and male sure seems fucking miserable, they’re always fucking bitching and whining, never fucking happy, they’ve always got something to cry about. It’s quite sad, as in pathetic, that they just can’t be happy being themselves and because they can’t be happy they go out of their way to try and make white heterosexual males unhappy.

Fucking cunts.

Anyways.

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It’s flashback time in this new episode of Preacher, the adventures of Tulip and Jesse when they were a criminal duo, a criminal duo that decided to give up a life of crime Tulip reluctantly Jesse with slacker enthusiasm.

The Tulip O’Hare character, originally female in the comic books, held together the first season of Preacher and her character binds together, and drives forward, this season. Ain’t that nice, a female character always intended to be female being the driving force of a TV show that also features two strong male characters. How refreshing.

Tulip’s life, upon losing her unborn child, became really depressed, forced into a life of an ordinary wage slave, forced into putting up with a boyfriend who was a slacker, forced into boring shagging sessions as a means of replacing her lost unborn baby with a new baby. It can be an unhappy life, if we want it to be and Tulip in these flashback moments obviously wanted her life to be unhappy as punishment for losing her unborn child?

These flashback moments capture perfectly the mundane nature of human life we pretty much go through most of our lives, especially as adults, doing the same things day in day out until, sometimes tragically, we die. It’s insane that we decide to live the way that we do and it’s down to a lack of imagination and too much laziness that we can’t find alternatives. These flashbacks also reveal Jesse’s turning to God for help much to Tulip’s shock and horror.

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Though Tulip is a super strong character she’s still a lesser character than Jesse Custer, she’s Jesse’s bitch when she does stuff he doesn’t like he gets super pissed at her and gives her a right good rollicking, basically he’s a bully. Personally I don’t like bullies. The way I perceive the world and people goes a little like this, though we are all different in lots of ways we’re also the same and it’s this sameness we should all focus on rather than the stuff that makes us different. Regardless of gender, age, skin colour, geographical region of birth, language spoken, religious belief, rich or poor we’re all equal. Now I know my perception is askew that’s just not how the world works, and for shame, but it’s how I operate within said world. In my own little part of the world, England, I’m considered working class scum, the only people considered lower than me are the many unemployed good for nothings and the criminal shits, of which there are many. The Royal Family, Her Madge, are perceived as better than everyone else in England and they happily lord it over the land and its people, we’re even considered royal subjects rather than citizens which tells you everything you need to know about England.

I don’t like that idea of some people being more equal than others just doesn’t sit well with me. Fucking cunts aren’t beneath me, neither are the worst members of society serial killers, mass murderers, rapists, child abusers sure it would be nice to think I’m better than such evil fucks but the truth is I ain’t. At all. For sure I’ve never killed anyone, never wanted to, and for sure I’ve never raped anyone, never wanted to, but does that make me better? It just makes me different, that’s all.

Anyhow.

Something is revealed, that seems true, in this episode no matter how much Tulip loves Jesse or Jesse loves Tulip the truth is Jesse Custer is an asshole and treats the woman he loves like shit. I’m sure some, a lot perhaps, of women can relate.

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This episode ends with the Saint of Killers laying waste to folk once again. He’s an unstoppable force. He’s a hurricane. An Act of God. Anything caught in his path… dies!

Yeah, I borrowed from the movie Blade for some of the above.

Preacher Two Point Four

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While watching this, latest episode, I wondered, ‘whatever happened to the vampire hunters trying to kill Cassidy?’ you know the one’s from the very first episode, were they merely a means to introduce the character and now they’ve been forgotten or will they play some kind of role in events to occur sometime in the future? If indeed there is a future.

While Jesse Custer isn’t troubled that Tulip O’Hare is missing, and while we seem to know Tulip is in some kind of trouble with a badass criminal mastermind the episode focusses attention on Arseface, in Hell, meeting Adolf Hitler, I always figured if there were a Heaven and a Hell that Hitler would be in Heaven sat at the right hand of God having a good old time, like Trump and Putin recently did in Hamburg. After all God, in the Old Testament, seemed rather fond of genocide.

I’ve never liked Hitler, but then again I’ve never liked God.

Or little baby Jesus.

The search for God seems to imply an Earthly agency, The Grail perhaps? was behind the fake God that visited Annville and the episode is divided into three plots Custer’s continued quest for God, ably aided by the vampire Cassidy, Tulip’s troubles with a crime boss and Arseface’s adventures in Hell, the latter plot is the one I found the most interesting, Hell being an overcrowded underfunded prison that was built to accept a few doomed souls and the surprise of doomed souls jailers at how many doomed souls have actually ended up there.

A damning indictment on humanity, it does indeed seem possible that we, as a species and also individuals, are a piece of shit, but then you probably already knew that.

Arseface strikes up a rapport with Hitler, and discovers that Hitler isn’t such a bad chap. Hitler is portrayed in this episode as a weedy little scaredy cat, but that doesn’t make any sense to me. Hitler, before the outbreak of World War One, worked as a labourer, I imagine the work life of a labourer at the start of the 20th century wasn’t any fun, I imagine it required stamina and strength, I imagine labourers were hard men used to hard work and though he was initially deemed unfit for military service he eventually volunteered, and was accepted, to serve in the Bavarian Army. He served during the battle of Ypres and the Somme receiving two Iron Crosses, his second was very rarely given to a soldier of his lowly rank. All of his commanding officers spoke of his bravery. This wasn’t some weak, weedy, laughable Austrian Hitler was a man, if he were British, or American, people would be endlessly going on and on about how brave and heroic he was.

After the war he rebuilt Germany.

I might not like Hitler but I don’t like to think of him as someone who was cowardly and weak, a coward and a weakling wouldn’t have been able to take a nation on its knees and build it into the most feared regime of the 20th century, perhaps of all time.

Love him or hate him but don’t pretend he was weak and cowardly.

Anyways.

Jesse goes a little Genesis crazy when he finally discovers, towards episode end, that Tulip might be in a life-threatening situation this attempt to save Tulip leads to some measure of violence and though Jesse Custer receives a kick to the balls he keeps on fighting.

I’m always amused that in fiction a man can be kicked in the balls and stay on his feet, as a male, with balls, I can confess with honesty and experience that a kick to the balls results in so much pain it causes much tears, vomiting and an inability to remain standing, fiction it’s fake for a reason.

 

Preacher Two Point Three

People’s hard luck stories don’t interest me one bit, I have no hard luck stories of my own because, I figure, life is a hard luck story so shut the fuck up going on and on about it. Life is supposed to be harsh, it’s supposed to be about day to day survival, struggle, fighting tooth and nail for one’s continued existence. I don’t do ‘snowflake’ behaviour and I don’t appreciate it in others or in the fiction I read or watch.

This episode features, at the start, teenagers enveloped in the nonsense of believing they are at the centre of the universe, everything revolving around an individual life until whoops life kicks a ‘snowflake’ in the arse.

BOO HOO HOO!

SOB! SOB! SOB!

But anyways enough of my own personal opinions the opening to this episode reveals the secret origin of Arseface, it’s a pathetic, as you might expect, origin story and informs we the fans of the show that Arseface’s hard luck story could have been less hard luck if he had let his teenage bitch friend end her own life without trying to intervene. Let people make their own decisions, right or wrong, and don’t interfere, mind one’s own business, especially seeing as Arseface was sent to Hell, by Jesse Custer, last season and spends an eternity reliving the incident over and over again.

Hell

With Arseface suffering in Hell Jesse, Tulip and Cassidy continue their quest to find God, heading to New Orleans in the belief God is chasing the best jazz in the world and probably is looking for that kind of music in the land of partying, drinking and vomiting in public.

The quest for God leads them to some weird sex thing, I confess when it comes to weird sex things I’m terribly naïve, I’ve never been to a strip joint, never wanted to, and I’ve never used a prostitute, and never will, and I’m no swinger I’m full on, and happy to be so, vanilla, so the weird sex thing wasn’t something I could get my head round, just what the fucking fuck was going on?

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That’s all I could think about throughout the rest of the episode, what the fuck was that?

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I did however take notice of the appearance of this misbegotten spawn:

Herr Starr

 

Preacher Two Point Two

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Whoa! Episode 2 followed fast on the opening episodes trail. I’m finding it difficult, once again, to stay on top of everything in my increasingly geeky little idiot life.

Jesse in an attempt to stop the Saint of Killers, a being immune to his semi-divine super power, gets a whole bunch of fuck nut gun maniacs killed. Here in  merry olde England, a place that is indeed very olde and so merry folk die laughing, we don’t have access to firearms, ALL guns are banned from the general populace, or as far as I know, ALL guns are banned. I’ve always found myself annoyed by my home nations gun laws, I want guns Goddamn it, a room full of ‘em, but at the same time I’m glad successive British governments have kept guns out of the grubby hands of this lands citizens, we’re mad and blood crazed at the best of times give us guns and I’d have been killed a decade, or more, ago.

Shot down in a blaze of anything but glory.

Now if you’ve read the comic books then you’re already aware that the Saint of Killers is a merciless badass mother, and father, fucker. He’s an unstoppable killing machine, though not an actual mechanical machine he’s some kind of supernatural beast that can, and will, kill every living thing in the universe to see that kind of badass murderous bastard in a live action TV series is really something to behold, I can tell thee, I could watch a series where the Saint of Killers, uttering barely a word, just kills his way across America and then the rest of the world, it’d be a grand idea to have someone make such a show.

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This episode is yet another great episode this is one hell of a show it combines a fine mix of comedy and action drama to produce a lot of fun entertainment. I find the quest to find God a compelling one, even though I’m an Atheist I can appreciate fictional characters trying to find another fictional character and as they travel across a land they leave behind them a slaughterhouse full of death.

Most shows have, I find, too many characters and the jump between a variety of narratives can damn the show better, in my opinion, to keep the cast of characters light to provide a tight TV show that when it moves slow it does so to build and when it moves at pace it does so at a speed that causes a viewer/fan to gasp and catch their breath.

Preacher 2

Preacher Two Point One

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Preacher season two begins with a discussion about circumcision and what happens to all those itty bitty foreskins. Not something I’ve ever thought about, and circumcision here in the U.K. isn’t a thing, as far as I’m aware most of us chaps still have our foreskins just flapping about down there between our legs.

Fortunately the foreskin discussion doesn’t last too long within mere moments the terrible trio of Jesse Custer, Tulip O’Hare and Cassidy are trying to out run a police car while singing along to Come On Eileen on the radio.

Unfortunately, after a very cool Seventies movie style police chase, our car full of idiots, whoops I meant heroes, weird that idiots and heroes kinda means the same thing, right? Anyways, our heroes are caught by the five-oh and Jesse is forced to hit the misbegotten lawmen with the Word of God, or Genesis, he takes much fun in making the poor men of law do unspeakable things to one another, like holding hands and causing some serious damage to a lawman’s gonads.

Jesse Custer seems to be enjoying his supernatural, and part divine, power having a bit of fun with what he can do and it’s a great super power, imagine being able to make people do whatever you tell them, what fun a person could have, you could be a terror to the assholes and shitbirds we all meet, and have to suffer, in life. I’d make those sorts of people shit their pants at every opportunity, just because it would be funny and very embarrassing for the asshole.

This first episode of a new season doesn’t let a fan, or random viewer, settle for a second first it’s all fun, fun, fun, and being cool and then BOOM! We get hit with ultra-fucking-violence, heads exploding, limbs being shot off, blood and guts, all the kinds of things I love about fiction, such things suck in real life but in the unreal they’re super cool.

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Oh, and yep, the Saint of Killers is on the loose and he’s permanently pissed off, which must be depressing.

There is a fuck scene, it’s no hardcore full penetration job, this is TV after all, but I still didn’t like it, fake violence I LOVE fake fucking I don’t and here’s my reason why, fucking is, or should, be a very personal experience between the people who are doing the fucking, it shouldn’t be something other people watch as entertainment, violence as entertainment I’m down with, it’s fun, fucking should have stayed very personal making it a public spectacle just made lots of people really weird.

Less fake fucking more fake violence. Please.

This first in a new episode is gloriously over the top and ends with, for Steve, a tribute to the late, and great, Steve Dillon co-creator of Preacher.

Twin Peaks

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My first blog post of 2017. I do enjoy blogging, but only because I enjoy writing and expressing an opinion, mostly unpopular but an opinion nonetheless. Recently, excited due to a new season of the show, I watched seasons one and two again, the first time since the 1990’s actually, season one is possibly the best season of a TV show ever and season two is a mess, a marvellous mess but still a mess.

I have enjoyed Twin Peaks so much I own the series twice, DVD and blu-ray, the blu-ray version bought because my DVD version didn’t contain Fire Walk With Me and it was impossible to find the movie in my home town.

I can only speak for myself when I say, ‘new Twin Peaks is so bonkers it’s ace!’

So far it’s more bonkers than season two, I confess I have no idea, yet, what’s occurring within the series, no idea of what’s actually going on, and that’s why I like it, it’s mad, perhaps it’s genius, I can’t say for sure I’m an idiot I probably wouldn’t recognise genius if it ran up and head butted me in the face.

I don’t watch a lot of TV, for several reasons, one is because I’m British living in Brit-Land and I find British TV shows, except Doctor Who, boring and uninteresting, reason two is because I find it difficult to find TV shows that have something to say that piques my interest. I like bonkers, the more bonkers the show the more interested I am. I SHOULD like the Marvel and DC TV shows, as I’ve been a fan of the comics for forty years, but they’re so boring and the DC shows seem aimed at teenage girls, romance and love triangles play as big a part of story content as does kicking some super-villain in the ass.

Superhero shows should be fucking mental, instead they’re just bland.

Fortunately Twin Peaks exists, and that warms my cold bitter dead little heart.

New Doctor Who?

I haven’t wrote a blog post in what seems like an age due to my Internet connection being absolutely dreadful, though it doesn’t bother me, I’m a 20th century boy, it would be nice, in this the modern age, to have a decent and reliable Internet connection but I don’t. Apparently, here in the U.K. the Internet ain’t great, it’s supposed to be shocking in the nations capital, London, the cellular network is also shockingly bad, fortunately I’m not a phone person.

Purpose of this piece of writing is of course Doctor Who, the British television series, I’ve read recently the present actor portraying The Doctor Peter Capaldi might be planning to end his tenure in the role.

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If Peter Capaldi is planning to quit his role I’d like to see Wil Wheaton become the new Doctor, I think he’d be extremely honoured and prepared to portray The Doctor for three or four seasons maybe more.

Maybe it’s time for the BBC to plan on giving the job to someone from a non Caucasian male background, although I would like to see a completely sinister dark Doctor portrayed by someone terribly English, a Doctor who really is a danger to the kinds of monsters and villains he faces. Or perhaps an epic five season storyline that features the return, for good, of the Time Lords, a science fiction version of Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings with The Doctor akin to the role of Gandalf the Grey, dying halfway through the story reincarnating as a new Doctor and then being all Gandalf the White for the remainder of the story.

I do like Doctor Who I want for it to continue for a long time to come.

Be Mo Farah

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If there’s something you want to do, like really, really want to do then you’ve got be inspired by someone like Mo Farah, I’m not sure if everyone saw his 10k race during the Rio Olympics but the dude fell heavily to the floor rolled back onto his feet and won the frikkin’ race it was the best example I’ve ever seen of someone really wanting something badly enough to not give up. It was inspirational. Olympians can inspire us all, perhaps more than any other type of person. For the purpose of a blog post I’m going to list a few challenges I’ve decided to try and be Mo Farah at:

Be Happy Now

There’s no point being happy at some undetermined future time because the future’s so unpredictable we all might be dead before we can be happy. Though I’ll be happy if all our deaths are the result of a zombie apocalypse or alien invasion, we’d be living in a freakin’ movie and wouldn’t that be great? Yes it really, really would.

I’m not present enough to be happy at times yet to come I never, or very rarely, make plans for the future I just exist from day to day present in the moment but not present enough to plan ahead. In my life everything happens by accident and nothing is pre-planned, fortunately those accidents turn out well rather than disastrous. Lucky me.

Being happy isn’t something that happens by accident however it’s something you’ve got to want, like Mo Farah winning his race, you’ve got to wake up and be happy it doesn’t matter what time of the day I wake sometimes it’s 04:00 and sometimes it’s 14:00 it depends on my shifts at my place of employ but I always make the effort to be happy, usually by messing about while looking in a mirror, for some reason my ugly visage makes me happy. From my waking moment I make sure every moment brings happiness, preparing and eating food, wasting a few hours writing or drawing, reading comic books, watching DVDs, deciding what to wear, making the five mile plus walk to work, working out with weights, being alone and enjoying complete silence.

I don’t believe that the pursuit of happiness is the purpose of our lives, I don’t actually believe in anything, but I figure because we’re here, we’re alive, we’re still breathing without illness, physical and mental, to plague us we should be happy without having purpose or the wasting of time pursuing happiness.

Most of the time I’m not even aware I’m happy, until I catch myself smiling or laughing or I punch the air with joy because I’ve just watched something ace or read something remarkable but once I catch myself I’m amused because I’m happy about nothing major, I’m happy about being alone, I’m happy without being a winner, without having spent a shed load of cash and then bragging about spending a shed load of cash, I’m happy about having nothing really to be happy about other than happiness itself. It’s a challenge being happy in a human world that seems so fucking unhappy but be inspired by Mo Farah and fight to be happy, WANT to be happy.

Write A Horror Novel

If you’ve never tried to write a work of fiction before you might be under the impression that writing a novel is easy, you just sit before a notepad, or keyboard, and write away the story just flowing from brain to fingers to paper, or computer screen, but that’s not how writing works it requires talent, hard work, self sacrifice and lots and lots of inspiration.

I’ve decided to write a horror novel because my favourite genre, be it movies, TV, books, is the horror genre back in the good ol’ Eighties I read voraciously horror novels I never really read any other genre I had love for science fiction but only visually, movies, TV shows, comic books and I had love of fantasy novels but they tended to be these massive sprawling tomes and I preferred my fantasy more heroic, Conan the Barbarian, than high, Tolkien-esque.

My favourite writers throughout the Eighties were Stephen King, James Herbert, Dean Koontz and of course HP Lovecraft, I don’t read horror novels anymore, other than Lovecraft, I’ve tried to embrace the horror novel genre but I’ve been bitterly disappointed by the novels people, via the Internet, have recommended so I’ve figured why not write a horror novel, write something I want to read, so I’m going to make attempt, fail, feel sad, eat twelve pizzas, cry, crawl into a little ball and die unless of course I’m inspired by Mo Farah and persevere.

Create A Webcomic

I have this idea for a webcomic, it’s probably not a great idea but it is indeed an idea, I want to draw a webcomic inspired by Jack Kirby and have most of it, if not all, completed for August 28th 2017, Kirby’s 100th birthday.

My idea is pretty basic, dude gets super powers, discovers the world is not what it seems, fights evil, it’s all been done before, and much better than I can manage, it’s impossible for me to conjure forth anything original, or even interesting, I can only create stuff I want to read.

The origin of the super dude character has already been mapped out thumbnails wise now I face the hard work translating the thumbnails to full pencils to inks to digital colour add a bunch of coherent words and BOOM webcomic.

Lose Weight, Eat Less

I decided at the beginning of August to lose weight my aim was to lose eight pounds by September 1st I weighed myself at about 06:30 on the morning of September 1st and I was 13 stone 7 pounds rather than losing eight pounds I’d lost fifteen I was most happy with myself and my new target is to hit less than 13 stone by the end of the year. It’s not going to be easy, it requires a lot of hard work, commitment, determination and fighting through days when I just want to eat pizza for breakfast, dinner and tea.

Eating less has been my method of losing weight, I’ve never really ate a big breakfast, preferring two eggs scrambled or berries,  Greek style yoghurt and peanut butter (Whole Earth, crunchy, no added sugar) I’ve stuck to my usual breakfasts alternating so as not to get too bored eating the same thing every morning. For dinner/lunch I’ve mostly ate vegetables with noodles and for tea/dinner two chicken breast, salmon, or a chicken thigh. In between meals I’ve ate one banana and one Satsuma (easy peel) I haven’t found myself feeling hungry, I’ve been quite happy with my diet but I have noticed on the few occasions I’ve ate a large meal a feeling of being bloated, it’s been most unpleasant, and I figure eating less has caused me to be unable to eat more.

I’m of the opinion that we, in nations like Britain, eat far too much, we seem addicted to eating. I live in the centre of my hometown, the desk I sit at to write these blog posts, my novel and create my webcomic is situated so I can see out of my living room window I see the people from my hometown wandering about throughout the day and night most of them are overweight, most of them heavier than me, some of them, a lot, are obese.

I have no problem with fat people, it’s their choice to be massively overweight but I have come to the conclusion that humans are supposed to be slightly, or even massively, under weight. During our caveman days I imagine men and women to have been under weight, I imagine food sources were scarce hunting hardly easy and with so much competition meat wasn’t always a stable part of the human diet. I imagine that early humans were more vegetarian than carnivores and I imagine that life was really harsh, required of people to be on the go from the moment the sun rose to the moment it set, I imagine cavemen, and women, were skinny things and no one was ever fat with this imagining in mind I’ve figured the healthiest choice is to be under weight and not overweight so I’m going to try and reach a weight below my ideal.

In addition, cave people didn’t eat bread, cakes, McDonalds or drink gallons of Coca Cola because such things just didn’t exist, they survived well enough for all of us to be here now on meat, fish, fruits, nuts and vegetables they were the strongest, healthiest, hardiest, fittest humans to ever exist, THE most successful humans in our long bloody history as well as being inspired by Olympians we would do well to be inspired by our caveman ancestors without them fighting to survive every day there’d be no me and no you.

Reduce Sugar Intake

Sugar is evil.

We consume way too much sugar, just about everything we eat, especially packaged food stuff, is drenched in sugar, I don’t know why this has become socially accepted perhaps because sugar is an addictive compound it makes us buy more food thus making someone somewhere extremely wealthy. More fool all of us for making other people extremely wealthy we’re supposed to be clever, a smart monkey, but we just seem fucking stupid.

Throughout August I mainly ate vegetables, fruits and chicken my intake of sugary crap was greatly reduced I didn’t notice a difference in my attitude, I wasn’t happier or unhappier, but I did end up losing 15 pounds in weight.

I must be inspired by my weight loss and continue to avoid eating chocolate and drinking fizzy drinks, it’s obvious they’re not going to be good for me, health wise, so why keep consuming them?

It’s the same theme with smokers and drinkers they know they’re doing themselves harm by smoking and drinking and yet they continue to drink and smoke, like I’ve already made mention we’re supposed to be smart but all the evidence points to the unarguable fact that we’re idiots.

Be A Friendlier, Nicer Person

I’m neither friendly or nice and I’m happy for others to be unfriendly and nasty towards me, doesn’t bother me one bit, I just don’t care, fuck people, but it wouldn’t hurt me, well maybe not, to be friendlier and nicer though it does seem like a lot of hard work.

Over a decade ago I tried to be friendlier and nicer I managed two and half days on the third day I felt so ill I threw up in my mouth and thought, ‘fuck this shit!’ stopped being friendly and nice and immediately felt much better.

This time however I’m going to work through the feeling of sick, work hard at being nice, endeavour to be friendly, I don’t know why I’ve decided to make this attempt it just seems impossible and I’m the kind of person who wants the impossible to be possible, like wishing for a zombie apocalypse or an alien invasion or better yet an alien invasion during a zombie apocalypse. Hmm, why isn’t there a TV show featuring such an idea? Think The Walking Dead mashed with Falling Skies only well written with interesting characters. If only.